FEATURED SELECTION from CHAPTER 1:
“What Is Clearheart, and Why Is It the Essence of Empowerment?”

"Clearheart"

         This brings me to the term Clearheart, and why it is so central to my life, this book, and my work: 
         My therapist had this way of gently asking a question that always brought me right to where I needed to be for what I needed to work on. Whenever I would get lost in whatever head-spin I’d put myself in, he would softly ask, “What’s your heart saying?” He pointed out that your head can mess with you all day long, but the heart never lies. The more you allow your head to push you around, so to speak, the less you are being true to your true self. And the more you fail to be true to your deepest self, the more frustrated and unhappy you make yourself.
         Through the course of my therapy, I came to embrace this question. Every time I got out of my head and really started listening to my heart, I gained insight and clarity. The insight allowed me to see what was really going on, and the clarity allowed me to see what I needed to do about the insight I had gained. It was difficult at first, but I discovered that the more I listened to what my heart was saying, the stronger I became. Then—surprise of all surprises—I actually started to enjoy life and like myself! Like puzzle pieces coming together to reveal the bigger picture, I realized that what was actually unfolding within me was empowerment. Empowerment is not dysfunctional force or manipulation; it is pure inner strength, based on unconditional love and self-respect. It is that inner sense of being fully in control of your life, of knowing you are the captain and navigator of your own ship.
         My key to empowerment was to be absolutely, one hundred percent, no holds barred, clear with my heart, despite my head’s ego and spin trying to get in there and call the shots. Clear means simple, transparent, free of obstruction, and beyond doubt, confusion, and head games. Being clear leads to clarity, the ability to think, understand, and see (in the all-knowing sense) clearly. The heart, that massive pumping organ that allows your other parts to work, is the baseline of your physical life—when your heart stops, your life here on earth stops. The heart is also the center of your nonphysical being, the seat of your unique personhood, your essence, your true I. Think of some of our most common heart references: get to the heart of the matter; have a heart; in my heart of hearts—not to mention, the heart being the symbol of love. 
         Being clear with your heart is very much an inward-outward process. The inward part means really listening to your heart, the core of your very being. What is your heart saying? Maybe it’s saying, “These people are just trying to manipulate you.” Maybe it’s saying, “Don’t allow yourself to be intimidated.” Maybe it’s saying, “Your ego likes your new job title, but it’s not a good fit for you.” Or maybe it’s saying, “Don’t be afraid. Go for it!” Whatever it is, your heart gets to the heart of the matter. It speaks the truth.
         The outward part may be a little harder because it entails acting upon the heart’s messages. Easier said than done sometimes. Maybe it means telling your spouse you’re not going to take that seemingly great job after all. Maybe it means telling your toxic family you’ve made other plans for the holidays. Maybe it means to lighten up with someone you’ve been treating harshly. Communicating from the heart elevates you to your best self. It may not be what others want from you, but your heart has your best interests literally at heart.

         Hence, what I call Clearheart. What could possibly be a better baseline in life than to be clear with your own heart and to communicate that clarity through all your thoughts, words, and deeds? Clearheart is a mindset, a way of thinking and living. This inward-outward process is the essence of your empowerment.
         Throughout my decades-long process of empowerment, one vital fact has proven unshakable: the more I have connected with my heart and lived by the law of love, the better my life has become. As I’ve restructured my life from the inside, tangible manifestations have followed in spades: I have found and married my sweet soulmate, Tony; I enjoy excellent health and wonderful friendships; my horizons of knowledge and understanding continue to expand immensely; and my career continues to unfold in ways I’d previously never dreamed of.  
         I’ve never exactly come full circle. Rather, I’m spiraling inward, outward, and upward—sometimes elegantly, sometimes awkwardly, sometimes dropping a stitch and having to backtrack, certainly not perfectly, but always as a wholly appropriate expression of my learning process. In coming to places I’ve been to before, I keep applying what I’ve learned along the way. Through years of refined application, I’ve distilled certain principles of empowerment based on the universal law of unconditional love: The more you align yourself with love on the inside, the more empowered you become, and the better you experience life on the outside.
         Although this book is all about growth and improvement on every plane, I do not dwell on dysfunction or the subject of healing. For some, healing implies an assumption of sickness, which is not a part of this work. Virtually everybody, however, has at some time experienced disease in its original sense of dis-ease. This describes a condition of the inner being, a sense of feeling ill-at-ease or uncomfortable due to poor alignment with the flow of love. This type of dis-ease is sometimes described in terms such as a “wounded” inner child who carries emotional “scars.” Since the body, mind and spirit are all one—are all expressions of what makes up you—unattended emotional and psychological pain can ultimately manifest as various un-well conditions of the body (injury, illness, discomfort) and the personality (dysfunctional behavior). While I agree that wounds should not be ignored, I am neither doctor, nor therapist, nor “healer.” I am a child of God, as are you.
         As a child of God, I am on a path of learning, the current cycle having begun with my physical birth in 1948. On my path I have learned some things of great value—and some at great cost— which I joyously pass along to you, my fellow traveler. A wonderful byproduct may be that you may experience a healing, however great or small, of something within you that has been ill-at-ease. Through some eyes, this may brand me an expert, which implies that I’m big and you’re little; neither is true. If I am to bear any label, call me a dedicated sharer of love. 
         We all learn by sharing each other’s knowledge and experience and, most of all, our being-ness. This book shares mine. It is my intention that it will serve as a useful guide for your own journey. But it will not fix you because, deep down, you are not broken. It will not heal you because, deep down, you are not sick. And it will not bring you to God’s love because, through and through, you already are God’s love. 

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